Rocking the LSAT

So I just did about 40 LSAT questions and answered all but two correctly. I gave up watching Old School with the guys to do it, but some sacrifices must be made. If I can keep it up thru October 4th, then I will successfully rock the LSAT.

But Not that anyone really cares...

The "cool" thing of the summer happened yesterday. You know, that thing you call your folks about. For me it was spending some quality time with Jeremy Schaap (Cornell alumnus, 1991, and Daily Sun Editorial Board member during his hay day).

Schaap, who hosts outside the lines nightly, took some time out from his schedule to come back to the Cornell Football Association fundraiser. He, Tony Kornheiser, and Ed Marinaro were all special guests at the banquet. The following is my e-mail depection which went out to the kids I met in LA, the paper's sports e-mail list, and some recent alumni:


"Sunnies, Top Thirty, and other friends,

CFA stands for Cornell Football Association, but before the evening began I thought the "F" might as well have stood for fat.

The Cornell Daily Sun was recently selected by Cornell to receive the annual Bill Mintz media award. I, being the only sports staffer in Ithaca, was asked to attend the dinner and ceremoniously accept on behalf of the Cornell Daily Sun Sports Staff, past and present.

When I arrived tonight, I was taken a back. Where I expected to see tall, strapping (pardon my Gary-esque wording) men with hot wives, I saw none. They were all fat. Ok, there was one, I mean Ed Marinaro was there, but the rest of the guys were just plain fat.

I spent the next twenty minutes trying not to talk to any of them.

Later, while waiting for dinner with our photographer and the representative from sports information, I struck up a conversation. It mentioned in the program that Ben Mintz passed away in 1991, so I assumed the award was relatively new (also why the Daily Sun had never before received it). That's when Jeremy, my pal in sports info coughed up the info that this was the 27th presentation of the award.

Jokingly I asked if the dart had hit us this year, and he told me no.

"You guys had never received it before, which is why we chose you," he said. "That, and we scrapped darts for a pin-the-tail-on-the-donkey-like approach."

Not sure whether I should have felt honored or slighted, I made small talk with our photographer. Then J. Andy Noel, our athletic director showed up. Much to my disappointment, he did not look like FDR. For once, he was wearing neither his wool overcoat or red scarf.

Next some annoying fat guy got up and tried to speak over the crowd. He kind of reminded me of a certain Daily Sun Alumnus.

The dinner itself was better than I had expected, and I'm not just complementing the food. With the exception of M.C. (he was fat, too. Did I mention that?), the rest of the night turned out great.
It all started with our football coach talking about how we should do better than we did last year, but not well enough to win the conference. Next, surprise guest Ken Blanchard (he wrote the one minute manager) got up and told us all how that was a bunch of bull shit and if our coach had a pair, they'd shoot for a perfect season like Don Schula (sp?) and the 1970 era Dolphins.

Then Ed Marinaro got up and told us all how much he hated Ken Blanchard for working with Don Schula. Marinaro's team lost to Schula's Dolphins in Super Bowl VIII. Marinaro completed his speech by trying to add his newborn son to the live auction.

"How about $150? He costs a heck of a lot of money, but I've already paid for all his shots," he said. "Hell, for $200 I'll even throw in his mother."

A guy in the back started to raise his hand, but then his wife hit him. I suppose she wanted to wait until Marinaro threw himself into the deal, too. Either that, or she was waiting to bid on the color commentator's package, which included a chance to broadcast a Cornell football game over the Internet. I know I had at least 25 cents sitting in my pocket for it.

I also had an award on my lap, but it wasn't all mine. Part of it belonged to the guy who took the stage next: Jeremy Schaap.

Schaap, and his father had both done their respective tour of duties with the Daily Sun, and while Schaap might have graduated in 1991, I'm sure that some of the things I've been taught were also taught to (or even by) him. Institutional memory is key at our paper, and I'm thankful for all the people who put their time in before me.

Schaap was on tonight, taking jabs at everyone including Harvard Hockey. But the magic wasn't all Schaap. Alongside him was Tony Kornheiser, who's daughter Liz attends the hotel school here.

The two of them took questions from the crowd, playing off and taking sides just like an episode of PTI. Schaap also took time out to address a very important point: that his ratings with Outside the Lines were higher than Tony's. Tony just laughed it off and hammered on the Yankees with a wit that brought both a tear to my eye and a smile to my face. Overall it was a very impressive show.

(Off the record, the two also noted how Dusty Baker's biggest reason for leaving San Fran was really Barry Bonds. Apparently Bonds isn't well liked in the club house, and Baker has gone as far as to say -- once again off the record -- that any team with Bonds will never win a World Series. It was deep stuff. Kind of like when we all found out that Monica and Chandler from Friends were sleeping together.)

Later Adam (the photog) and I grabbed Schaap. He was more than happy to pose for a photo with our award, and even asked about the new office. I told him I'd show him around if he wanted, and he instantly reached for his phone.

He was going to put my number in his phone -- I almost choked up a nut!

But it was in his jacket back at his table. Before we left, I slipped him a business card so he could call me. I suppose Jeremy Schaap having my number on a card is just as good as him having my number in his phone. Maybe he'll even call from time to time.

Yeah, and maybe Seabiscut will have a sequel.

Anyway, as I found out, the "F" in CFA also stands for something else. It stands for family. There's nothing like seeing four buddies who used to play football bid 5 grand on a pair of giants baseball tickets for a former coach. They easily could have won for less, probably something like $20 seeing how nobody realy likes Barry Bonds anyway. But no. Instead they pulled out their wallets for the cause of the Cornell football program. They helped a bunch of kids who they hardly even know, who from their record don't seem to work hard enough, and don't even seem like they deserve the money.

Like I said, it was just like a family."

The coolest part, though, took place the following day. On Sunday, Schaap actually called me and asked if we could meet up so he and his friends could see the building. I said sure, rolled out of bed and called Adam. In ten minutes we were at the Sun.

Schaap and his friends were all sunnies, and by default very cool people. They poked around the new building, marveled over the woodwork and large room upstairs, spent some time in Nate's office, and then left.

But not before grabbing a freshman issue. Schaap's friend (the AE from 89 to 92) noticed my column, which Schaap then started reading. It was cool to think that he actually read my stuff.

And it's even cooler to get 6 1/2 hours of sleep.

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My fourth Ithaca Journal article comes out tomorrow. I'm working on my fifth and it's a doosy -- all about how international students can get visas to come to Cornell, becuase Cornell has pull with the state department, while smaller schools can't help their students on that level (i.e., TC3)